Go EASY on Me

I remember in high school that a good friend and I scoffed loudly and longly (yep, just made up another one) at another girl who had "just discovered" The Breakfast Club.  This was fall '94, and well, to be honest, we had just begun to seriously quote and reference it a year earlier, but REALLY.  Just getting into a John Hughes classic...in 1994?  Shameful.  That girl we scoffed at, who was an entire year OLDER than us, deserved our reprimands...didn't she?  In our opinion, definitely.  Now, however, as a mother of two, a full-time teacher 9 1/2 months out of the year, and a wife who does her best to care for her hubby and her house, I am now THAT girl.

I just--FINALLY--got to view Easy A, and YES, I did fall even more in love with Emma Stone*.   I know!  I didn't think it was possible either, but I totally did.  I also discovered that I want my hubs and I to parent like Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson, but that's another post all together.  Wait, maybe it isn't: I LOVE THEM SO MUCH, TOO!  Oh, Stanley Tucci, you're amazing: I love your face almost as much as Emma Stone's.  Patricia Clarkson, I love you down to your toes, too...even in Simply Irresistible you were, well, irresistible. 

Back to the film...So witty.  So clever.  So sad and way too true to life...I hate rumors and drama and peer pressure...even more so, since I see it wreak havoc on my students' lives.  I also love that the film draws upon one of my favorite pieces of classical literature, because unlike everyone else I've ever talked to, I actually really enjoy the Scarlet Letter.  What else did I enjoy?  Two more things...quick like, cause I bet you've already stopped reading: 1) the endless references to 80s classics.  Thank you for keeping John Hughes alive!  2) The boring weekend montage, cause even though I love being where I am in life with my beautiful family, I totally miss boring teenage weekends all by myself being stupid and doing stupid things.  

So, scoff at me.  Reprimand me.  Make fun of me, cause I just saw this new teen classic.  That's okay with me.  I'm too old to care, but I'm not too old to stop appreciating cinematic greatness...even if it does take me years to catch up with it.  Hey, Ms. Stone doesn't care.  She's giving me the thumbs up. 

*I still don't think I can see Spiderman, though.  I wasted time sitting through boring Tobey Maguire, and I'm still pissed I lost those hours in my life.  So, even though this cast is much hotter and more talented, I don't think I can sit through it...well, maybe if popcorn is involved... 

Shop Til You Drop

Husband and I have been shopping around for pre pre-schools for our oldest to attend.  She'll just be going half days, but we want her to get some fun socialization going before the real learnin' starts in Kindy-garten.  As we've been going around, Baby A rates the schools based on their kitchens.  You know what I mean: lil play kitchens, with pots and pans, food, etc.  I was ALL about these when I was wee, too, so it's funny to hear her say, "Mummy, I want to go back to the school with TWO kitchens.  It had a DORA ONE!"  (Yes, one school not only had two kitchens in one room, but that same room also contained a Dora kitchen.  The kid's got her standards, too.)

This has all been reminding me of my first days in pre-school.  It was called Mother's Morning Out and was held at the church I would soon attend with my bro and mom.  I STILL vividly remember one of my first lessons at the pre-school: DON'T YELL.  We were playing restaurant, which I thought was awesome.  I quickly started to draw upon my own knowledge of restaurants, which pretty much just came from re-runs of Alice.  Now, I don't remember much about Alice, but back then I remembered enough to yell the orders back at the "chef" in the "kitchen."  Let's keep in mind that I wasn't too happy to be assigned the waitress role: I wanted in that kitchen.  After I took the order of the customer, I yelled it back over my shoulder to the chef.  I was quickly reprimanded by the teacher that I should walk the order back to the kitchen, for yelling was impolite.  My quick reply was, "That's not how I see it in restaurants and on TV."  That may have been one of the only times I ever talked back to the teacher.  She probably quickly labeled me as one of those kids that have been at home their whole life, cared for by loving parents and grandparents instead of being put into an in-home daycare and taught real respect. 

And, that is my childhood anecdote of the day, sponsored by First Presbyterian Church's MMO of 1984.

The Original Nighttime Soap is Back

Dust off your belt buckles and ten gallon hats, cause Dallas is back, y'all!  It looks more deliciously tawdry than ever, thanks to the lax moral standards on TNT (or any other basic cable network).  Oh, I still remember watching Dallas as a child.  Yes, my parents allowed me to watch Dallas at a very young age, and I still thank them for it.

Oh, the excitement that would race up and down my spine as I'd hear the opening chords of that most amazing theme song every Friday night.  I might even say the most amazingest theme song in the history of television theme songs.  The bold, black stripes that would divide the screen, South Fork ranch spreading majestically across the Texas plain, the glorious downtown Dallas skyline, horses racing across the green fields, and then...there he was...Patrick Duffy!  Yes, Patrick Duffy was a young girlhood crush, and no, the decades-age difference didn't even bother me.  Oh, when Pamela found him in the shower: that look he gave over his shoulder...to die for!

How I loved to loathe J.R. and Sue Ellen!  Such a perfectly suited couple they were: so hateful and vengeful and selfish!  I absolutely adored Miss Elly, too.  She was so gentle, kind, and would totally go to bat for Bobby and the family when J.R. was acting an ass (which, lets face it, he did EVERY episode).  I wanted to live on South Fork, ride the horses, and I think I believe that the theme song would just be pumped through speakers strategically placed throughout the mansion.

I am genuinely looking forward to the reincarnation of the show...even if it does have Jordana Brewster, whose face just kind of annoys me for some unknown reason.  TNT has been churning out some quality programming (Franklin & Bash, anyone!?!), so I have high hopes for this stellar nighttime soap.  South Fork is back, big oil is back, the Barnes/Ewing feud is back...J.R. IS BACK!!!  Buckle up, it's gonna be a hot summer on the streets of Dallas!

Food Associations

I've been thinking a lot about food lately, and how I need to cut my intake of it--drastically.  I don't know why I have such an unhealthy relationship with food, but I am trying to work through it.  Many who know me would probably not even have a clue at my food addiction, but I have come to terms with the fact that I definitely have one.  (Knowing that is half the battle after all.)  Let's face it: you can't cut food out of your life...you kind of need it to survive.  And, I can't just turn my back on it completely: I love preparing it too much.  I just have to start monitoring my intake and being smarter.

I promise I won't obsess to you publicly about food and tell you each thing I've eaten.  I'm not going to go on some fad diet and tell you each pound I've lost.  I've done this before, and it hasn't helped.  In fact, I'm going to throw all caution to the wind and take a moment to celebrate food: all the bad food I love.  Without much further ado, let me lay down three of my most favorite entertainment franchises and the delicious eats that go with them!

I cannot think of Back to the Future without thinking of Pepsi.  Marty loves Pepsi Free, 2015 loves Pepsi Perfect, and I've been loving Pepsi since I was five.  Oh, I remember getting delicious, wee Dixie cups full of Pepsi on the weekends.  Now, unfortunately, it's become a daily habit, but I want to celebrate its awesome pop fizzy sweetness anyway...and my favorite movie trilogy of all time.

Twin Peaks.  The Double R.  Agent Cooper + blackcoffee&cherrypie=true love.  I can't watch an episode of Twin Peaks without craving Norma's cherry pie and black coffee...even though I've never had the pie, and I would laden the coffee with two sugars and skim, I'm sure it would be as delicious as Coop describes.  And, DONUTS.  Row upon row of perfectly aligned donuts in the station break room.  My mouth is watering right now.

Then, there's the worst of all.  GILMORE GIRLS.  Pop culture references galore and two of the skinniest, smartest actresses around eating tons of junk food and not gaining an ounce.  (Hey, if they won't gain, I won't either, so pass another sliceuv za!)  I don't get through ten minutes of an episode without longing for the greasiest, cheesiest, pepperoniest pizza on the planet.  While I was watching GG for the first time, the amount of times I had Village Inn pizza is embarrassing.  (That's a local pizza joint that has the most perfect bad for you pizza in the area.)  Two good things happened last year: I got through GG and stopped eating/craving as much pizzaCokedanishesgreasydinerfood, and Village Inn moved to the neighboring town, which is now a 40 minute round trip away.  Thank God Luke's isn't right around the corner...

Summer Blockbusters???

I'll be honest, folks: not too excited about what's on board this summer.  Here's a quick rundown.

Suppose I have to...out of obligation.

Nope...No...DEFINITELY COULDN'T BE LESS EXCITED.

Probably, out of sheer curiosity.

DEFINITELY!!!  Yes, yes, YES!  With dust on my heels I'm already in line!  I'm actually posting this from the delightful Savoy 16 cineplex.

A Highly Logical End

It was an ending I wasn't totally expecting, but as I cleared the tears from my eyes and forced myself to stop bawling, I came to a zen-like, Spock moment: it was highly logical.

Yesterday, I finished the final season of what has become my most favorite guilty pleasure, Big Love.  HBO's dramatization (and at times glorification) of a polygamist family in Utah caught my attention in its first season.  I was in a Ft. Worth hotel for a few days visiting my uncle and his family.  The second episode of the first season aired three times while we were there, and I watched the same episode each time it was on.  Each season has been purchased on DVD without being viewed beforehand: I call that a cold buy.  After that one episode I saw three times, I knew this show was something different and dare I say to much public chagrin...special.  Special for centering its attention on such a hush-hush/taboo subject, and outstanding for towing that line between sheer drama and guilty soap opera plotlines.  I knew a show that is on the network that has taken TV drama to a new level, one that demands perfection and greatness, would not let me down.  My money would not be wasted on these cold buys.

The acting was incredible, the characters so well drawn and played out that I feel like they were actually in my life, and the ending was perfect for where the family Henrickson had come from and where it had gone.  To continue my Star Trek references, the Henricksons had boldy gone where no polygamist family had dared go before in this or the last century: PROUDLY PUBLIC.  I loved their bravery, the reality of their family struggles, and their desire to put faith above all else in their family lives and drama. 

Many wonder how I could love a show about polygamy so much, and I still think it goes back to the last bit in the paragraph above.  Even though these were fictional characters, their need to be a part of a church and a family of people centered on God was refreshing, especially for a network such as HBO.  When you strip away the outrageous history and mythos behind polygamy and Mormonism, when you get the crux of their faith, you realize they are just fighting for what they believe in...and, don't we all have a right to do that? 

I'll miss you, Henricksons...yes, even you, Nicki. 

Book Club

I've decided I want to join a book club.  I've tried book clubs in the past, but I can never seem to keep up with them.  Well, okay, I'll be honest: I am a book snob.  I don't want to read beach books, serial mysteries (or any other serial in the vein of James Patterson, Janet Evanovich, or the like), or romances.  I want to read Stephen King, Charles Dickens, Kate Hepburn biographies, and stories of people struggling to find their way in cultures too diverse and changing to make up their mind who they want to be/come (White Teeth, New Miss India, Bone, etc).  I also love me some memoirs, especially of the food variety.  Most of all, I love subtle wit.

So, I'm going to form my own book club, and it's going to be so elite that everyone will want to join in.  (Then they'll have to read the books I want to read to hang out with us.)  After watching the 2012 season finale of SNL, I know exactly who to invite, too.  Amy Poehler will bring the funk.  Kristen Wiig will bring the sly, subtle sexual references that keep a conversation going.  Tina Fey and I will create the discussion questions (because we will actually discuss the books).  Jon Hamm, the lone male member, will bring the Pepsi and beer (Coke and wine will NOT be allowed) and classy eats that go along with those bevvies.  (But the first time he mentions the Blues or Cardinals, he'll be asked to leave.)  Finally, my birthday twin, Meg, will help me pick the selections for each month...as long as she's willing to bend to my criteria clearly stated above.

  

Once the group gets some buzz, the six of us will develop a membership application to be filled out online, and we will review these at the end of every meeting.  There will be no membership fee, but you will have swear on a stack of dusty classics to never mention the name Nicholas Sparks.